POETRY & ARTWORK

Barnacles, Dirty Barnacles.

inebriated again, but only enough to enjoy it and not enough to stop from bloggin’. had a great time today. started a new and promising drawing and yes, it involves barnacles. you’ll see,

however, today i was gathering the mixed emotions from the previous month and smashing them neatly into a huge ball of unexpected rage which i’ve thrown at my sister too much. realized, apologized and began to cope. bottom line, we attended the blackbirds 80s dance party which i loved for the tunes - glorious beats and sounds - and danced with a real cool Kenyan who looked like miles davis. but what can i say, i’m kinda into someone i met recently so we’ll just have to take it easy and wait and see. i dislike liking someone, honestly. its kinda a bummer to get excited about a guy wanting to meet up for a date and talk (a guy who is actually my type and that i’m attracted to in more than one way) because it means caring - which takes up alot of time and space in my mind. ugh. but it also means a reason to settle down and that dancing is just dancing, it doesn’t mean that i’m easy and lonely. it means that i’m excited… to go on a legit daytime date, show off how awesome and smart and beautiful i am and see if i feel the same about him as i feel about myself, haha! until then, i’ma just hang out, theres no room for footsy until i see what i see… but theres a second potential suitor from prior years who truly trumps all men. we’ll see, we’ll see what we see. until then, i will try to keep this blog art - oriented. you dirty barnacles!

“I’m Sorry that I’m not Sorry.”

some times theres too many wise words to say anything at all. sometimes, its yourself that hurts you and no one else and because you are so intent on making other people feel pain you try your hands at hurting yourself. emotions are hard. if you could hold them in your palms, you would feel weight. you’d feel sharpness pushing itself into the wrinkles and cracks of your skin. you would be crushed. 

i’ve done a lot to be proud of in the past week, and a lot to regret. for whatever reasons i did them, i have no shame and no remorse and even if i know they weren’t the wisest choices, they’re mine. my experiences, my faults, my conflicts, my mistakes, my memories. mine. no one else can change them or take them away from me. i know they’ve shaped me (perhaps not for the better) but regardless of that shape, i enjoyed myself. i made myself happy.

To quote someone I’ve met here in Santiago de Compostela,

“I’m sorry that I’m not sorry.”

¡Hola España!

Finally doing a lot for me, thinking of myself and starting to fall back in love with my life again. Goodbye for now North America. See you later with refreshed eyes. Hello adventure, art, love and experience; Hello Spain.